Pick Up Lines
by spockapella
Summary: Pre-time skip, pre-Artemis, Wally and Dick/Birdflash Pre-Slash fluff (Holy cheese whiz that was a mouthful) In which Dick confronts Wally about his awful pick-up lines.


A/N: First Time Birdflashing it up. Pre-Time Skip. Pre-Meeting Artemis. Fluff. Yup. For my dear buddie Makayla. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own Young Justice, DC Comics, or any of their characters.

* * *

Dick slid into the booth across from Wally laughing.

"I'm tellin' ya Wally, you shoulda seen his face!" he exclaimed.

Wally grinned as he examined the breakfast bar's menu. "Wasn't aware ol' Batsy had more than one expression."

"Please, haven't you ever seen the 'Batglare'?" Dick said, looping his fingers over his shades like a second pair of sunglasses. "If he had _that_ expression all the time I think I'd have to move out."

"That's why I'm glad I don't live with Barry," Wally put in. "You should see him try to discipline me." He scrunched up his face in some sort of attempt to mimic his mentor's face. "'Now listen, Kid. No more patrols before ALL your homework is done. Blah blah blah.'"

Dick giggled at Wally's contorted face. "I thought you said you were good at juggling. One of your 'many skills'."

Wally rolled his eyes. "Well yeah, but I still find it ridiculous that homework is a preset to trying to help people."

Dick snorted. "No kidding. Pretty sure human life is a little higher on the priority list than my GPA."

"Hey boys!" A waitress chirped brightly, interrupting their conversation. "Can I get you anything?"

She was pretty. Young, probably about the same age Wally, she had large brunette curls that bounced when she spoke. She held a small notebook, and stood off-balance, one hip sticking out to the side. Her name tag read "Annie" in girly, loopy handwriting.

Dick saw the look in Wally's eye and groaned preemptively. Both Wally and Annie shot Dick curious looks.

"Um... Is something wrong?" Annie asked, a blush rising on her cheeks.

"Oh, no," Dick said, waving his hand dismissively. "My friend here is just about to embarrass himself trying to impress you."

Wally tensed. "_Dude_."

Dick rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "What was it you said again? 'Can I get you anything?' Well, a typical Wally response would be something like, 'Depends, are _you_ on the menu?' or 'No, but maybe I can get _you_ something' or something equally obnoxious."

Wally stared at him in horror for a moment before recovering, breaking in with a light laugh, giving the waitress a Wally-West-worthy grin. "Don't worry, babe. My moves are much better than my lines, if you know what I mean."

"Unbelievable," Dick said, throwing his arms out to Wally. "It's like stupid pick up lines just _come_ to you."

"Oh, you mean the stupid pick up lines that _you_ use?" Wally retorted.

Dick gaped at him. "I do _not._ That is no way to woo a lady's affections."

He gave the waitress a look as if she were supposed to understand.

Annie, however, just looked confused.

"Oh come on," Wally said, also looking to Annie. "You can't seriously be falling for this?" He shook his head in disgrace. "It's the glasses, isn't it? Can't see his eyes, hard to tell if he's lying to you."

Dick scoffed. "Are you _ever _going to get over the sunglasses thing?"

Wally leaned forward, folding his arms over his chest. "_No_, and you wanna know _why_? Because you're supposed to be my best friend and you can't even look me in the eye and tell me that my pick up lines are great!"

"Well maybe if you _had_ great pick up lines-"

"-You know that I do-"

"-Then I could do that, but seeing that your lines are-"

"-Totally awesome and you know it _you_ just-"

"Okay!" Annie squeaked, throwing her hands up. "Maybe I should come back later-"

"NO!" they cried in unison.

"You don't have to leave because-" Wally tried.

"Seriously, Wally can control himself he just-"

"-My friend here just really likes to make me miserable and-"

"-Chooses not to. He's like a five year old, no filter he-"

"-you learn to love him, but it's hard when-"

"-says whatever comes to mind no matter-"

"Babe, wait," Wally said, as the waitress started backing up. He reached out a hand and clamped it over Dick's mouth. The Boy Wonder looked enraged, but Wally ignored him. "I'm sorry about that, let's start over."

She gave him a slow, nervous smile. "Alright, um... What can I get you then?"

Wally rescanned the breakfast bar's menu, taking his hand away from Dick's mouth. Dick scowled and slumped in his seat.

"I'll have two of your chocolate pancake specials, an omelet with all the fixings, both sausage and bacon-" He looked up at Dick. "You're paying right?"

"Duh."

"Make that three chocolate pancake specials then," Wally said, pushing the menu toward the dumbstruck waitress. "What do you want, Rob?"

Dick looked away. "Not hungry."

Wally blinked. "But-"

"If he changes his mind, I'm sure you can share," Annie said, scribbling down the massive order and backing away quickly. "Anything you'd like to drink?"

"What? Oh, orange juice or something," Wally said, looking at Dick in concern.

"Alright, coming right yup," the waitress said practically jogging away from them.

"Dude, you okay?" Wally asked, leaning forward.

Dick gave an exasperated sigh. "Nothing I just... I just don't see why you have to flirt with every female we come in contact with, okay?"

Wally's eyebrows raised in surprise. "Every female we-"

"Yes, Wally, _every female_."

There was a pause. Wally's lips moved, but no sound came out.

"It's no big deal," Dick said. "But... Can't my company just be enough? Do you have to be woman-hunting where ever we go?"

Wally smiled a little at the comment and said, "I guess you have a point..."

"Okay," Dick said, relaxing. He felt himself blushing for admitting all that out loud. "Well since that's settled-"

"You know I'm always whelmed to just be with you, right?" Wally suddenly blurted out.

Dick leaned back. "Um."

"Never mind, how long before my food gets here," Wally rushed, looking over his shoulder and scanning around the entire breakfast shop to avoid eye contact.

Dick smirked. "Whelmed, huh?"

Wally rolled his eyes. "And you think the things _I_ say are corny."


End file.
